Frozen Cookie Dough Balls

Everyone has a chocolate chip cookie recipe, BUT I swear this one is the best! They're Mrs. Bowden's Chocolate Chip Cookies and they are mmmm mmmm good. Mrs. Bowden was my 6th grade English teacher and she would use cookies to bribe us in class, and it worked! When we graduated from high school she invited us all back for a party, a small reunion of sorts. She baked us cookies, showed us pictures of ourselves as awkward little 6th graders and sent us home with the recipe to make the cookies ourselves. Ever since then this had been my go to cookie recipe. 

Mrs. Bowden's Chocolate Chip Cookies

3/4 cup brown sugar
3/4 cup sugar
1 cup shortening
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 eggs
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking soda
2 1/2 cups flour
1/2 - 1 cup oatmeal
1 bag chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Mix sugars, shortening and vanilla. Add eggs and blend. In a separate bowl combine salt, baking soda, flour and oatmeal. Slowly add dry mixture to wet mixture and mix thoroughly. Stir in chocolate chips. Roll dough into 1-inch balls and place on ungreased cookie sheet. Bake 9 - 11 minutes.

So this is my system when I make cookies lately.

1) Gather the ingredients.
2) Mix up the stuff according to the recipe.
3) Make the dough balls, BUT instead of cooking them all, I prep one cookie sheet for the oven and the other for the freezer.  

4) While the cookies are baking, I put the rest of the dough balls in the freezer so they can harden.

5) When the cookies are done baking I put them on a rack to cool, then I put the dough balls in a zip block bag and return them to the freezer...and of course I sit down and eat a cookie (or two or three)!

I love this system because 1) I don't chow down on an entire batch of cookies in a day and a half, 2) I have cookie dough all ready to go, so if I want to cook up just a few cookies it's super easy and 3) cookie dough is mighty good to snack on (although you probably shouldn't do that because there are raw eggs...but still).   

The other idea I just got from Pinterest: package the dough balls up nice and pretty and give them as a gift. Genius!

Giving Away Blessing Bags

Found this photo on this website.

I did it! I gave away some of my blessing bags this week... and it was really awesome!

The first opportunity came last Thursday, which was an extremely cold, windy day. We were driving to meet my mom for lunch and I saw the guy sitting on the corner. He was hunched over, clutching a sign, and obviously freezing. My heart jumped when I saw him, this was it. I was a little nervous, but I pulled the car over, jumped out, handed a blessing bag to the guy and ran back to the car. As I drove away I looked in my rearview mirror and saw him digging through the bag, then I turned and he was gone... and I cried. I have no idea why I cried. For all I know he could have looked in the bag and threw it away. But for some reason, watching him look in the bag made my heart hurt. I have no idea what happened that lead him to the corner that day, but he had hit rock bottom and that made me sad.

But that's not where the story ends. I met my mom in the parking lot and we went into the restaurant, ordered food and sat down to eat. About halfway through our meal, as I was explaining to Cameron why we don't eat macaroni and cheese off the floor (awesome!), a man walked in and sat at a corner table. He looked pretty rough, freezing and probably homeless, but I couldn't tell for sure so I watched him for a couple minutes. When no one else came to join him and I saw him blowing into his scarf to try and warm up I decided that my gut was probably right, he was homeless. At that point I wasn't thinking about the fact that it was probably the same man from the corner, but in retrospect it probably was.

After a few minutes of debating what to do, I made up my mind. I went up and asked him if it would be ok if I bought him a sandwich. At first he was a little hesitant. I think he was worried I was going to try and get him thrown out of the restaurant. But when he realized I was trying to help, he took me up on my offer. He said a sandwich would be nice and maybe something warm. I ordered him a sandwich and a hot chocolate. Then Cameron and I went over to deliver the food to his table. He seemed very thankful. I introduced myself and shook his hand (which was FREEZING) and asked for his name...it was Mark.

I have no idea if we made an impact on Mark or not. But I hope we did. I pray he saw Jesus in us and I pray that we gave him a little sense of hope. Most likely I won't be making a habit of buying homeless people meals, I think this was just a way for God to catch my attention that day. But you never know...

Saturday I had another opportunity to give away another bag. It wasn't as much of an ordeal, I barely had time to get the bag out the window of the car before I had to turn, let alone ask the man his name. But I was thankful that I had something to give him.

So long story longer :) the blessing bags were awesome! The money I spent was definitely worth it and I plan to continue to keep my car stocked so I can be prepared when I run into homeless people in the future.

Go make some bags. I promise it will be worth it.

4 Meals to Take to Friends

ComputerClipArt.com

When my girls were born a bunch of friends and family brought us meals...and it was awesome! Not only was it fun trying other people's recipes, but it was such a relief not to have to plan meals and go grocery shopping. Now whenever friends have babies I like to make it a point to take them a meal, because I know how much I appreciated it when they did if for me.

Unfortunately, even with the best intentions, making meals for friends can get a little overwhelming. I know, I've been there. Life is pretty crazy and getting meals on the table for my own family can be a challenge some days, let alone getting food prepped and ready for a friend. But through trial and error I've learned it doesn't have to be like that.

Here are a few tips that can help simplify the process of taking meals to friends.

• If you've offered to coordinate meals for a friend, make it easy on yourself. Use a website like TakeThemAMeal.com to setup the schedule. Create a page and send out the link, then you're done.  
• Plan what you're going to make ahead of time and do your shopping before the day of. That way you're not trying to fit too much into one day. 
• Pick a dish that's easy to make, easy to transport and easy to reheat (check out some of the meals below). 
• Make double so that there is enough to feed your family for dinner too.  
• Drop your food off earlier in the afternoon so you're not interfering with dinner time (yours or theirs).
• If you want to visit when you drop the food off, leave your kids at home. You don't want to cause any additional stress for a friend who is adjusting to life with a new baby.

Here are a few meal ideas. These recipes have gone over pretty well when I've taken them to friends.

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A Mexican Style Feast... 

Mexican Lasagna

Cilantro-Lime Rice

Black Bean and Corn Salad

Mexican Lasagna
(courtesy of my mom-in-law)

Ingredients
1 lb ground beef
1 medium onion, diced
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 package of flour tortillas, cut into strips
1 can ranch style beans
1 can of chilies and tomatoes (Rotel)
1 can cream of chicken soup
2 cups shredded cheddar cheese
2 cups shredded monterey jack cheese

Preheat oven to 350. Fry ground beef, onion and chili powder. Drain if necessary and set aside. Mix chilies and tomatoes and cream of chicken soup and set aside. Spray a 9x13 pan and layer 1/2 the tortillas, 1/2 the meat, ranch style beans, cheddar cheese, 1/2 the tortillas, 1/2 the meat, chilies, tomatoes and cream of chicken soup mixture, and finally top with monterey jack cheese. Bake 45 - 60 minutes. Makes 10 servings.

Cilantro Lime Rice
(Courtesy of our friend Kaye)

Ingredients
1 cup dry white rice
1 onion, finely chopped
2-4 garlic cloves, pressed
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 bunch fresh cilantro, chopped
1 lime, juiced
Salt and pepper

Cook rice according to the instructions and set aside. Saute onion and garlic in the olive oil until the vegetables have softened. Add rice and heat thoroughly. Shortly before serving, add the cilantro and lime juice. Stir thoroughly and add salt and pepper to taste. Makes 4 servings.

Black Bean and Corn Salad
(Courtesy of Rachael Ray)

Ingredients
1 can (14 oz) black beans, rinsed and drained
2 cups frozen corn kernels
1 small red bell pepper, seeded and chopped
1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
2 teaspoons hot sauce (Tabasco)
1 lime, juiced
2 tablespoons vegetable or olive oil
Salt and pepper

Combine all ingredients in a bowl. Let stand at least 15 minutes for corn to fully defrost and flavors to combine, then toss and serve. Makes 4 servings.

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For the Italian lover...  

Baked Ziti

Garlic Bread

Green Beans

Baked Ziti
(Courtesy AllRecipes.com)

Ingredients

1 lb dry ziti pasta

1 onion, chopped

1 lb lean ground beef

2 (26 ounce) jars spaghetti sauce

6 ounces provolone cheese, sliced

1 1/2 cups sour cream

6 ounces mozzarella cheese, shredded

2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese

Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add ziti pasta, and cook until al dente, about 8 minutes; drain. In a large skillet, brown onion and ground beef over medium heat. Add spaghetti sauce, and simmer 15 minutes. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Butter a 9x13 inch baking dish. Layer as follows: 1/2 of the ziti, Provolone cheese, sour cream, 1/2 sauce mixture, remaining ziti, mozzarella cheese and remaining sauce mixture. Top with grated Parmesan cheese. Bake for 30 minutes in the preheated oven, or until cheeses are melted. Makes 10 servings.

I don't really have a specific recipe for the Garlic Bread or Green Beans. I cook them a little different every time I prep them.

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For the vegetarian...

Tomato-Basil Soup w/ Ricotta Dumplings

Beer Bread

Spinach Salad

Tomato-Basil Soup w/ Ricotta Dumplings
(Courtesy of my little sis)

Soup Ingredients
1 teaspoon olive oil
1 clove garlic, pressed
1 can (15 oz) crushed tomatoes
1 1/2 cups chicken or vegetable broth
1/4 cup snipped fresh basil

Dumpling Ingredients
1/4 cup ricotta cheese
2 tablespoons fresh Parmesan cheese
1 egg white, lightly beaten
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon coarsely ground black pepper
1/3 cup all purpose flour

For soup, combine oil and garlic in a saucepan, cook and stir over medium heat 1-2 minutes, or until garlic begins to turn light golden brown. Immediately add tomatoes, chicken broth and basil. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer 5-7 minutes stirring occasionally. Meanwhile, for dumplings, combine ricotta cheese, Parmesan cheese, egg white, salt and pepper in a small bowl. Mix well. Add flour, stir until just combined. Roll ricotta mixture into small balls and add directly into simmering soup. Cook until dumplings float to the surface, about 2 minutes. Makes 2 servings.

Beer Bread
(Adapted from Allrecipes.com)

Ingredients
3 cups self-rising flour*
3 tablespoons sugar
1 can (12 oz) beer
2 tablespoons butter, melted

Preheat oven to 375. Spray or butter a loaf pan and set aside. Combine flour, sugar and beer and mix well. The mixture will be sticky. Pour mixture into loaf pan. Bake for 50 minutes. At the last 3 minutes of baking, remove the bread from the oven, brush the top with butter and return to oven.

*To make your own self-rising flour, add 1 1/4 teaspoons baking powder and 1/4 teaspoon salt for ever cup of all-purpose flour used.

Spinach Salad

Ingredients
1 lb spinach, rinsed and torn into pieces
1 green apple, chopped
1 cup walnuts, chopped
1 cup dried cranberries
Shredded Parmesan
Vinaigrette

Combine spinach with apple, walnuts, cranberries and Parmesan. Toss with dressing before serving. Makes 8 servings.

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A little home cookin' goodness...

Meatloaf

Parmesan Mashed Potatoes

Veggie of Choice

Meatloaf
(Courtesy of my momma)

Ingredients

2 lbs ground turkey or beef (or a combination of both)

2 eggs, beaten

1 cup Italian bread crumbs

1/4 cup oatmeal

2 carrots, shredded

1 onion, chopped

1/2 cup ketchup

Pepper

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Combine eggs, bread crumbs, oatmeal, carrots, onion and ketchup. Add meat and and mix thoroughly. Add pepper to taste. Spray a 9x13 pan and form meat into a loaf shape in the middle of the pan. Cook for 45 - 60 minutes. Makes 6-8 servings.

Parmesan Mashed Potatoes

Ingredients

3 lbs potatoes, peeled and chunked

1 cup milk or cream

1/4 cup butter

1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
Salt and Pepper

Boil potatoes in salted water for approximately 20 minutes until potatoes are soft. Drain. Add butter to warm potatoes. Warm milk in the microwave for 30 seconds and add to the pot of potatoes. Mix thoroughly. You can add more butter and milk/cream if necessary to get the potatoes to the consistency that you like. Add grated Parmesan, and mix. Add salt and pepper to taste. Makes 8 servings.

Veggie of Choice
Cook up a veggie (zucchini, squash, beans, broccoli.etc), and you've covered all the important food groups.

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Add a dessert (cookies, brownies, dirt cake)  to any of these meals and you're all set... yummy!

GOOD LUCK COOKING!!

Blessing Bags

Several years ago Ryan and I did the Crown Financial bible study series on how to manage your money in a godly way. Part of that study talked about helping the poor. I remember our group having an in depth discussion on what exactly Jesus meant when he commanded us to help the poor (because today's society looks a lot different than biblical times). Our discussion eventually lead to some pretty standard questions: What do you do about beggars? Do you give them money and risk them spending it on drugs of alcohol? Do you do something else like buy them a meal? Should we do anything for them at all?

One of the ladies in our group said that she always kept water bottles in her car and when she saw someone standing on a street corner, she'd roll down her window and hand them a water bottle. Intriguing. That definitely got me thinking, but that's about as far as things went.

Five years later, I still have never done anything to help. Actually, I take that back. One time about two years ago, I saw a homeless man sitting at the intersection as I was getting onto the highway. I happened to have some cookies in my car, so I rolled down my window and I handed them to him...but that hardly counts.

Anyway. Every time I see someone standing on the side of the road I feel like I should do something, but I never do. For awhile I thought maybe I should keep some gift cards for McDonald's or Subway in the car and hand those out, but I never did anything about it.

Then a few weeks ago I was reading a blog—Life Unexpected—and I saw a post she did about homeless bags. What a great idea! She packed bags full of food, toiletries, socks, etc. and kept the bags in her car so when she saw people she would have something to give them. Brilliant. If her husband was with her when they saw someone, he would get out of the car and ask the person their name and tell them that he would be praying for them. How awesome is that?

I loved her idea, so I decided to make blessing bags of my own. Most of the time I'm driving by myself or with my girls, so getting out of the car and talking to someone might not be the best idea, but I can at least have bags packed in the car ready to hand to someone when I have the opportunity.

Here are some ideas of what to put in the bags: non perishable food and drinks, toiletries, cards, a pocket bible. I ended up adding a few other things too: first aid kits, note pads and pens, mittens. You could really add whatever you want.

Then I printed out some blessing cards.

And put everything together in bags.

Now I'm going to put these bad boys in the car and be prepared next time I see someone in need. To be honest, I'm a little nervous about giving the bags away. It's kind of a weird thing. But I just hope that God uses it as a way to touch someone who may have lost hope.

It really is easy to put these together, and it's not a huge investment considering the impact that you could have on a person's life. So go make some bags people!

Knuffle Bunny

These Knuffle Bunny books are seriously awesome! We checked one out from the library a long time ago and I was hooked, so I ended up buying them all. All three books are about a little girl named Trixie and her BFF Knuffle Bunny. The stories are really cute, but my favorite part is the illustrations. Mo Williams integrates Trixie, Knuffle Bunny and the rest of the family into old black and white photos, it's so cool! If you haven't alread ready the Knuffle Bunny books, you definitely need to add them to your book list. I promise you won't be disappointed!

Valentine's Day Cards from Toddler Artwork

I really wanted to make Valentine's cards with Cameron this year, but she's still too little to really understand the concept. Then I had the idea of taking her "artwork" and converting it into fun cards that we could give away to family and friends.

She had a blast coloring "trains" and "hearts" on the paper and I had a blast turning them into cards (as you can most definitely tell from these pictures!).

Here's what you'll need:

Construction Paper or Card Stock in Various Colors

Paper Punches

Scissors

Glue

Black Archival Quality Pen

Have your toddler go crazy coloring, then use any kind of paper punch to cut shapes from the paper. I used a heart punch since we were making Valentine's.  

Then you can take the shapes and turn them into whatever you want!

So fun! This would also work great for birthday cards, thank you notes, or anything else of that nature. And the best part is you get to spend some quality time with your kiddos. Win, win!

Valentine's Day Cookies

Baking cookies is so much fun, especially the kind you get to decorate! I haven't ever had a good roll out cookie recipe, but I got my friend's family recipe a few months ago and it is awesome! With Valentine's Day right around the corner, I decided it was time to whip out the baking stuff and make some heart shaped cookies. I had a few friends over, and of course my kiddos jumped in on the action too!  

Here's the recipe:  

Names Family Holiday Roll Out Cookies

Cookie Dough

1/2 cup soft butter

1 cup sugar

2 eggs

2 tablespoons cream

1 teaspoon vanilla

2 1/2 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

Cream butter and sugar. Mix in vanilla, eggs and cream and beat until fluffy. In a separate bowl mix flour, salt and baking soda. Mix flour mixture into wet mixture. Refrigerate dough until firm (I usually put it in the fridge overnight). Roll out dough to 1/4-inch thickness. Cut into shapes. Turn oven to 375 degrees and bake 6 - 10 minutes until very lightly browned. Cool completely on a cooking rack. Then ice with frosting.

Frosting

6 tablespoons butter

4 3/4 cups (1 lb) powdered sugar

1/4 cup milk

1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla

food coloring

Slightly soften butter. Mix in milk and vanilla. Add powdered sugar and beat until well mixed. Add food coloring.

Here's everything else you'll need:

Rolling Pin

Cookie Cutters

Parchment Paper (optional)

Frosting Bags and Tips 

Sprinkles

Roll out dough and cut into shapes. Make sure to use lots of flour on the counter or your dough will get stuck and you'll have to use as spatula to get the cookies off the counter. That's what happened to us! Oooops! I used parchment paper on my cookie sheets (which I've never done before) and it worked great. It really helped get the cookies of the sheets without breaking them. I should have conformed to the parchment paper movement years ago!

Here's our beautiful frosting colors. Very festive if you ask me.

And here's the finished product.

Something that's kind of fun to do with these cookies is to tie them up in individual bags and give them away as gifts. You can give them individually or put several into a fun dish or basket. They look so pretty and they taste great. Pretty much the perfect gift if you ask me!

We Heart Peepsqueak!

As soon as little Peepsqueak bursts out of his shell, he is on the move!

He is determined to fly—high, High, High! But is he too little to reach the sky?

We are in love with this new book, Peepsqueak! It's a really cute story about a little chick who wants to fly, "high High High!" and won't give up until he figures out how. The illustrations are really fun and you can't help but smile while you're reading the story.

The author, Leslie Ann Clark, is a super sweet lady with a huge heart, and it's evident by the way she makes Peepsqueak come to life.  

If you haven't already read this book you need to get your hands on a copy. You can find it on Amazon for just under $10.

Mommy Brain

The Urban Dictionary defines Mommy Brain as the following: 

Mommy Brain: The phenomenon known to mothers where their brains become useless piles of goo after being around their children for too long.

(Side note: I love Urban Dictionary, cracks me up that you can actually find a definition for something like Mommy Brain.)



I don't know if I would go so far as to say my brain has become a useless pile of goo, BUT I would most definitely say that some days (ok, most days) my brain is on overload trying to keep track of the ten thousand things that I'm trying to juggle. It's hard to believe I make it out the door without leaving one or both my kiddos behind! (Ok ok, I would never ACTUALLY leave one of my kids behind, but sometimes I do take a second glance in the review mirror just to make sure there are two little bodies secure in their car seats. Don't lie, you've done it before too!)

Keeping track of my cell phone, for example, is ridiculously hard. I swear, I need to permanently attach that thing to my body. I am constantly running around my house trying to figure out where the heck I had it last. And somehow I always find it in the most obscure places, i.e. the closet, between the couch cushions. I wish I could blame it on Cameron, but sadly I can't. 99% of the I'm the one responsible for leaving it in those strange places (although the reason I'm usually rushing off leaving it is because of urgent matters that arise with the girls, but that is neither here nor there).

So, how do I cope with Mommy Brain? LISTS. You bet ya, I am the queen of lists. My husband makes fun of me for being a nerdy list person, but let's be honest, without my lists I wouldn't be able to keep track of anything at all. I make lists of things I need to do, things I want to buy, people I need to email or call, questions I have. Yes, it's pretty ridiculous. But it works, and when you find a system that works, you go with it. Am I right?

So what happens when Mommy Brain sabotages my list system? Disaster!

Yesterday I made a much needed trip to the grocery store. We were literally out of food, so I had a pretty substantial grocery list. So we're at the store, I have my list in hand, Sydney in the Bjorn and Cameron driving the "car" on the front of the cart. (Have you seen those things? They are incredibly hard to push around, but genius because they get your toddler excited about the grocery store.) We've just made it through the produce department and are waiting at the deli counter to get meat and cheese. I look down and notice the list is gone. Crap! I had a gazillion things on that list and we've only just started. I quickly backtrack through the produce department to see if I can find it. No go. List is officially lost. Ugh. Now what? Go from memory. Great.

I proceeded to navigate through the store trying to remember everything on my list without the list, all while trying to make sure Cameron wasn't jumping out of the car or grabbing things of the shelf. Not exactly the easiest task in the whole world. Luckily, we made it out of the store with only one slight mishap—Cameron dumped a carton of eggs smashing several of them on the floor—and most of the items on my list. Not too bad considering.

I know it seems like I'm sitting here complaining about how Mommy Brain (which I kind of am), but the truth is, it's just the flip side of a motherhood coin that I wouldn't trade in for the world. Yes my life is crazy. Yes I forget things, I can't find things and sometimes feel like I'm loosing my mind. But if it wasn't for that, I wouldn't get this:

And the Lord knows, these two little munchkins really do bring me countless hours of joy.

So what can I say, this useless pile of goo, well it's just going to have to do. ;)

Carry On Warrior

A friend of mine emailed me this blog post from a blog called Momastery, about what it really feels like to be a mommy sometimes—IT'S HARD! Her prospective is genuine. It's honest. It's real. And I love it, because I can totally relate. Hope you enjoy it too!  
  

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January 4, 2012

2011 Lesson #2: Don't Carpe Diem

Every time I’m out with my kids – this seems to happen:

An older woman stops us, puts her hand over her heart and says something like, “Oh- Enjoy every moment. This time goes by so fast.”

Everywhere I go, someone is telling me to seize the moment, raise my awareness, be happy, enjoy every second, etc, etc, etc.

I know that this message is right and good. But as 2011 closes, I have finally allowed myself to admit that it just doesn’t work for me. It bugs me. This CARPE DIEM message makes me paranoid and panicky. Especially during this phase of my life – while I’m raising young kids. Being told, in a million different ways to CARPE DIEM makes me worry that if I’m not in a constant state of intense gratitude and ecstasy, I’m doing something wrong.

I think parenting young children (and old ones, I’ve heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they’ve heard there’s magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it’s hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that  most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.

And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers – “ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU’LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN’T!” TRUST US!! IT’LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!”  - those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.

Now. I’m not suggesting that the sweet old ladies who tell me to ENJOY MYSELF be thrown from a mountain. These are wonderful ladies. Monkees, probably. But last week, a woman approached me in the Target line and said the following: “Sugar, I hope you are enjoying this. I loved every single second of parenting my two girls. Every single moment. These days go by so fast.”

At that particular moment, Amma had arranged one of the new bras I was buying on top of her sweater and was sucking a lollipop that she must have found on the ground. She also had three shop-lifted clip-on neon feather stuck in her hair. She looked exactly like a contestant from Toddlers and Tiaras. I couldn’t find Chase anywhere, and Tish was grabbing the pen on the credit card swiper thing WHILE the woman in front of me was trying to use it. And so I just looked at the woman, smiled and said, “Thank you. Yes. Me too. I am enjoying every single moment. Especially this one. Yes. Thank you.”

That’s not exactly what I wanted to say, though.

There was a famous writer who, when asked if he loved writing, replied, “No. But I love having written.” What I wanted to say to this sweet woman was, “Are you sure? Are you sure you don’t mean you love having parented?”

I love having written. And I love having parented. My favorite part of each day is when the kids are put to sleep (to bed) and Craig and I sink into the couch to watch some quality TV, like Celebrity Wife Swap, and congratulate each other on a job well done. Or a job done, at least.

Every time I write a post like this, I get emails suggesting that I’m being negative. I have received this particular message four or five times – G, if you can’t handle the three you have, why do you want a fourth?

That one always stings, and I don’t think it’s quite fair. Parenting is hard. Just like lots of important jobs are hard. Why is it that the second a mother admits that it’s hard, people feel the need to suggest that maybe she’s not doing it right? Or that she certainly shouldn’t add more to her load. Maybe the fact that it’s so hard means she IS doing it right…in her own way…and she happens to be honest.

Craig is a software salesman. It’s a hard job in this economy. And he comes home each day and talks a little bit about how hard it is. And I don’t ever feel the need to suggest that he’s not doing it right, or that he’s negative for noticing that it’s hard, or that maybe he shouldn’t even consider taking on more responsibility. And I doubt anybody comes by his office to make sure he’s ENJOYING HIMSELF. I doubt his boss peeks in his office and says: “This career stuff…it goes by so fast…ARE YOU ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT IN THERE, CRAIG???? CARPE DIEM, CRAIG!”

My point is this. I used to worry that not only was I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn’t enjoying it enough. Double failure. I felt guilty because I wasn’t in parental ecstasy every hour of every day and Iwasn’t MAKING THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing. I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often. And because I knew that one day, I’d wake up and the kids would be gone, and I’d be the old lady in the grocery store with my hand over my heart. Would I be able to say I enjoyed every moment? No.

But the fact remains that I will be that nostalgic lady. I just hope to be one with a clear memory. And here’s what I hope to say to the younger mama gritting her teeth in line:

It’s helluva hard, isn’t it? You’re a good mom, I can tell. And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner. She’s my favorite. Carry on, warrior. Six hours till bedtime.” And hopefully, every once in a while, I’ll add- “Let me pick up that grocery bill for ya, sister. Go put those kids in the van and pull on up- I’ll have them bring your groceries out.”

Anyway. Clearly, Carpe Diem doesn’t work for me. I can’t even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so a whole diem is out of the question.

Here’s what does work for me:

There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It’s regular time, it’s one minute at a time, it’s staring down the clock till bedtime time, it’s ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it’s four screaming minutes in time out time, it’s two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.

Then there’s Kairos time. Kairos is God’s time. It’s time outside of time. It’s metaphysical time. It’s those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them.

Like when I actually stop what I’m doing and really look at Tish. I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is.  I notice the perfect curves of her teeny elf mouth and her asianish brown eyes, and I breathe in her soft Tishy smell. In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving but I can’t hear her because all I can think is – This is the first time I’ve really seen Tish all day, and my God – she is so beautiful. Kairos.

Like when I’m stuck in chronos time in the grocery line and I’m haggard and annoyed and angry at the slow check-out clerk. And then I look at my cart and I’m transported out of chronos. And suddenly I notice the piles and piles of healthy food I’ll feed my children to grow their bodies and minds and I remember that most of the world’s mamas would kill for this opportunity. This chance to stand in a grocery line with enough money to pay. And I just stare at my cart. At the abundance. The bounty. Thank you, God. Kairos.

Or when I curl up in my cozy bed with Theo asleep at my feet and Craig asleep by my side and I listen to them both breathing. And for a moment, I think- how did a girl like me get so lucky? To go to bed each night surrounded by this breath, this love, this peace, this warmth? Kairos.

These kairos moments leave as fast as they come- but I mark them. I say the word kairosin my head each time I leave chronos. And at the end of the day, I don’t remember exactly what my kairos moments were, but I remember I had them. And that makes the pain of the daily parenting climb worth it.

If I had a couple Kairos moments during the day, I call it a success.

Carpe a couple of Kairoses a day. 

Good enough for me.